Casual Dating Lists: How To Make ‘Em, And How To Leave ‘Em Alone

“The world went and got itself in a big damn hurry.” -Brooks Hatlen ‘The Shawshank Redemption’

Are You Single?

List all the best ways to combat your loneliness in our fast paced society. You can try and date to stay up to speed with the times. Hey, why not try speed dating? Why not try casually dating people you wouldn’t normally date for a change? Maybe you think you’re not in to certain types of people, but how can you really know unless you try to broaden your dating horizons. Think about who you like and don’t like. Make a list from that evaluation. Check off like a naughty and nice list a la Santa Claus. Think of it this way: I’m practicing therapy with this list right now.

Think About Qualities

Lose the list. Reinvent the list. Solidify the list. Your mind has a way of tabulating  the pros and cons of everyone you meet. Maybe writing a list will clarify your thoughts on the subject. And then just maybe discarding the list is exactly how you will become a better date. What the hell do you have some crazy list like this anyway? You could try writing a trial and error list, or a journal if you prefer. These practices could help you discover what your qualities are and really make them shine.

Getting Deeper Into Listing

The best way that you operate whether dating, working, playing, partying, planning, and anything is always dependent on one thing – you. You will not list anything if you don’t want to. Listing could be something to that you do to help you focus your overactive mind. Anyone can misplace his or her list.  Perhaps a day planner or electronic device will help you keep things sorted out. Perhaps by making a list and then discarding the list will be exactly what you need to do to sort yourself out. I have had family and friends who swear to this practice.Anything that you practice you will get better at. Practicing list making and then leaving the list behind will still help you keep your life in order.

Planning Social Gatherings

During the act of making plans is the best time to make lists. You are working out a system that effectively assists you to organize your thoughts in a precise order. If you’re trying to achieve clarity and structure, a list can help you achieve that. When you eliminate formal structure and let loose, you’ll find that things get easier.

Approach

Your approach to listing is more important than any actual list that you write. Here I am writing about lists and I didn’t make a list myself! I’ve gotta keep listing dating processes and why lists can help. List making, in a sense, is the act of dating. Did I just blow your mind? We list off all the things we like or dislike about the ones we are seeing. It’s a  process we do constantly, maybe even subconsciously. The complete list combines what we feel about anyone or anything.

You Are The List

If you make a list about yourself it might give you a perspective we may never have seen before. It will help you see yourself in a different light. Do you like your list? Perhaps that really means that you like yourself! But remember, everything you do or experience will not always be cheery or happy-go-lucky. Likely your list can help keep your life real. People cannot stay positive all the time. Artificial stimulation (i.e. alcohol or drugs) can be the pursuit of keeping up an exciting life for some people. If you can step away from artificial influences you will buy super viagra, metronidazole over the counter canada. be a better person for it. Perhaps a list of how to lose artificial stimuli is the right list to have. Perhaps finding someone a date is the best means of reducing that artificial lifestyle. Lists that help open your mind and make you see and do more cannot be a waste of time.

Sexual Lists

Now we are onto something!  A list of all the best ways to stimulate your lover is just brilliant. This list is not set in stone and maybe not even necessary to write down. Perhaps this list is best kept in your mind. The list that provides the most satisfaction for both you and your sex-partner probably would be the best list. If a list gets long enough, then you’re writing a book. Why not read them books? I love the standup bit from John Waters: (paraphrasing) “If you take someone home and they don’t have books -don’t fuck them.”

Lackluster Lists 

Lists that lack luster can be lost. It’s not a tough decision to lose the lists that either do not make sense or do not help clarify your dating. If you are bored and not even interested in reading or writing, why would anyone else be interested in you? Stick to a list or activity you can appreciate. If you make an interesting list, they will come to you – well not really, but people surprisingly will take to your improved activities, conversation skills, cool suggestions, and orderly way of doing things. All those things can be attributed to having the foresight to organize your thoughts and perform them. The popular poster “Keep Calm, and Carry On” could be about making a list. Why not make it an interesting list and not a lackluster one?

Is This The Final List?

It’s not likely. Your way of doing something does not have to be constricted or confined to a formal system. Strict systems of any kind are best avoided while dating. My final list is not a formal one; more just final thoughts on organized activity. If your date needs someone with some ability to take initiative, enable and guide, then you might find that your list making is a possible solution to providing. Best lists of all are the ones you participate in and not just think up. It’s only a thought until you make it happen. Why not go make it happen. Write some lists!